Wedding Songs...

Ohmygoodness I am so weird. I'm listening to wedding songs right now. It makes me want to pick out songs even though I'm not even going to get married anytime soon. Haha. It's funny, when I listen to these songs and their lyrics it gives me so much hope. Maybe the lyrics are exagerated for artistic measures but maybe (just maybe) that's what it's really like... you know, to find the love of your life and everything. I really don't know why I always think about this stuff. I'm perfectly content with the life I have right now... as far as relationships go at least. I have the most amazing friends in the whole wide world. What more could I ask for? Sigh: Maybe it's just me being moody or maybe this is just a normal part of being human? Either way, I don't like it. I don't like feeling like I need someone to complete me. I don't even think love is suppose to be about "needing" someone, I think it's about not really "needing" them but wanting them anyways. Actually, that sounds kind of bad too. I don't know. Love is something I haven't experined yet. I just wish I knew why I sometimes feel lonely even though I have everything I need in front of me.

For fun (and so I can just get this off my mind so I can go back to studying), I'm going to talk about the kind of relationship I want one day. Bwahaha. It may never happen, but a girl can dream right? Hmmm... so the kind of relationship I want. Well, it really wouldn't be all the fancy actually. I wouldn't need the flowers, the presents, the whole shabam. I'd just need moments of honest, sincere caring. I hate that feeling of not knowing whether or not the other person cares. That's how I felt most of the time with Daniel... I don't want to be with someone like that again. If someone is that important to you it shouldn't be that hard to show that you care. And actually it's not even the fact that he didn't show that he cared, it's the fact that he said that he did and did exactly everything to make it seem like he didn't. Anyways, whatever, that's the past.

Things I'd like to do someday with that special someone (Hehehe):

• Study at the library or stay up late studying till we both pass out together! I want to like accidently fall asleep on his shoulder or something... (LOL) Ohmygosh this is so nerdy... but I'd really like to meet someone who shares some of my academic interests.
• Do volunteer work together! Whether it's by studying abroad together or just helping out at a soup kitchen or something... Again, sorta nerdy, but I'd like to meet a guy I could do these things with. It shows that he cares not only about me but about others.
• Read the Bible. I feel like I've grown so far apart from God these days... I hope my future boyfriend/husband is a strong Christian so he can help me. It'd also be good because then we could base our relationship on God and I would know he would respect my decision for abstinence and everything.
• Take long walks. I want someone I can have quiet moments with... someone who knows how to appreciate just being together.
• Get couple rings. I just always thought this was really cute.
• Learn guitar from him. I would love love love a guy who could teach me some sort of instrument. It's just so I don't know attractive. Haha.
• Snow fight.
• Take long car drives.

Wow, I thought I'd have a long list... but I can't really think of that much right now. Honestly, my ideal guy is a guy who I find handsome and is honest, sincere, funny, kind of shy at times, understanding, caring, and patient. I just want someone who I can really trust and who'll accept me for me.